Hurt...

I seek programme outside college. I knew that I can’t survive by only following the usrah in the college. I joined a lot of big event in college, but I can felt that I myself am lack in the aspect of tarbiah. I felt that I must find a way for tarbiah.

Alhamdulillah, Allah shows me the way. Allah made me met the sisters that are really ambitious about dakwah. Allah made me met A that is good in dakwah. From the moment, I knew that my life is not only about improving myself but also about improving other people.

Everyone loves A. I love to follow A’s lecture. Each time I chat with A, A asks me, how is the dakwah? Where have you go? Long time I never see you in programmes, where are you right now? Each time A ask me the question, I felt very hurt. A had delivered all the things on dakwah to me. But still I am doing nothing.

I tried my best to write the issue on dakwah, but still I know dakwah is not only about writing. It is also about meeting with people and told them about Islam. But I can’t do it. I am terribly weak in approaching others.

Each time I remembered A’s lecture on Syahadatul Haq, I felt the pain. I don’t really know how to organize dakwah in my college. I can approach my friends outside there that are not studying in my college, but I can’t approach my friends around me.

Why? It is because I am not good like them in academic. The pain is bleeding. I can’t tell more…