Thursday, January 24, 2008

Guilty...



Ya Allah, today my journey is totally different. Yesterday, I just read about what happen in Palestine and I cried a lot. And today everything change...

Ya Allah, I already fast for three days. Every time I am fasting and when it comes to Maghrib, I felt very guilty to eat my food. I am thinking a lot about my brothers, my sisters, my fathers, my mothers, my children and everyone in Palestine. But I am not fasting today and eat a lot today.

Ya Allah, everything happens when my lecturer asks us to eat with our Sudanese friends that came far away from Sudan. I need to think between two, whether to fast (sunnah) or take care the ukhwah (bond) with our Sudanese friends (wajib). So I chose not to fast.

Ya Allah, I ate Lasagna. It is about RM13.90. Hmm..i drank Sprite . My mentor is the one that spend his money most to treat us. But still I felt guilty. I am eating the delicious food while my brothers and sisters in Palestine were dying for food.

Ya Allah, I really hope and pray that one day all of us will realize about Palestine. I hope my colleagues and all my Muslim brothers and sisters will remember Palestine in their heart and will do something for Palestine.

Pizza in his pocket

Did you ever hear about the boy
Who ate and ate and ate!
He ate early in the morning
And he ate when it was late.

But he didn’t thank Allah for all the yummy food he had
And he ate so much it made him sick!
Which really made him sad.

He ate dates in Damascus, which he thought were very nice.
And hot samoosas in Sumatra, seasoned with a special spice.

He had tacos in Tijuana with some sauce he got from Spain
And a bowl of fresh bakalava that he bartered in Bahrain.

He said gyros made in Cairo are a taste that can’t be beat,
And the lemonade in Yemen made a very special treat.

But the turkey made in Turkey
Could still use a pinch of salt.
If you ever visit Malta, you should
Have a chocolate malt!

He had pizza in his pocket, he had ketchup on his shirt,
And he bought an ice-cream sundae, so he wouldn’t miss dessert.
He had pizza in his pocket, he had ketchup on his shirt,
And he bought an ice-cream sundae, so he wouldn’t miss dessert.


On a bay in the Bahamas,
He ate bon-bons in a bunch.
And then he rushed back
Home so he could make it
Just in time for lunch!

Then one day he saw a little girl, who held her tummy tight,
And he walked over and asked her if everything was alright.

She said she was so hungry and had been hungry for so long,
Then he realized the way he ate was very very wrong.

He looked down at his own tummy and he started feeling pain-
Pain from eating too much food, but he knew not to complain.
So he brought the girl some food, shared it with her family,
Then they thanked Allah for what they had, and then he let them be.

So let’s try to learn a lesson and let’s try to do what’s right.
Eat the food your parents give you without a fuss or fight.

Always be thankful to Allah for all your yummy food,
Share what you have with others, because not sharing is rude.

Being thankful is what’s really great.
Eat the veggies on your plate.

And don’t be like the boy who always ate and ate and ate!

He had pizza in his pocket, he had ketchup on his shirt,
And he bought an ice-cream sundae, so he wouldn’t miss dessert.
He had pizza in his pocket, he had ketchup on his shirt,
And he bought an ice-cream sundae, so he wouldn’t miss dessert.

Being thankful is what’s really great.
Eat the veggies on your plate.

And don’t be like the boy who always ate and ate and ate!



Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Sorry..

I am sorry if i hurt anyone. I don't mean it. Allahu A'lam. I felt that i am not living longer even though i want it so that i can contribute to Islam. It is just some kind of feeling.

I am now writing a novel. I really hope that i can finished it at least before i die. Huhu.. i just don't really know what happens to me right now. Ya Allah,please forgive me..

Monday, January 14, 2008

Pain..

Ya Allah, it is too painful. The pain is unbearable tonight. I know that You want to clean me from all the sins that i did. I realize that i am doing too many sins during the usrah today. I felt like dying listening to my naqibah. There are too many sins that i did.

Ya Allah, i wish that You could forgive me. I will try my best to bear the pain. I know i should face it so that You will not punished me in mahsyar. I hope that it will make me emotionally better and i could find solace behind all these.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Concentration...


Ya Allah, someone told me that if i can be khusyu' in solat, then i can concentrate in my study. It is because khusyu' is something that is so difficult to achieve.

Ya Allah, i am sad as i can't become khusyu' in my solat. I just missed my 3rd rakaat just now while praying. I am so sad for that. What happens to me, Ya Rabb? Why it is so difficult for me to concentrate??

Ya Allah, i can't concentrate in my study also. I am lost in my own world. I am blurred almost all the time. I knew that i am anemic. I also knew that anemic can cause poor concentration. Is it because of that, Ya Rabb??

Ya Allah, i am sinner. I have done a lot of wrong thing. Is it because of that i can't concentrate? Forgive me, Ya Rabb. Thanks, Ya Rabb for the test. It makes me realize about all the wrong doing that i did.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

I have no cannons that roar..



This song is from the album of the same title with the beautiful singing voice of Dino Merlin. The songs are dedicated to all the Muslim Bosnians and to the memory of Dr Irfan Ljubijankic who was sadly killed towards the end of the Bosnian war in 1995 when the helicopter he was flying in was shot down by a Serb rocket. He had been visiting his beloved home town of Bihac, at that time the front line against the attacking forces. A few months earlier in his role as the Foreign Minister of Bosnia he had been in London. Whilst there he met Yusuf Islam to whom he gave a rough cassette of a song he had written and recorded at home, entitled 'Have No Cannons That Roar', the title track of this album.

I have no cannons that roar
But I have faith in God and love
And I'll surrender you to no one else
My mother, Bosnia, my love

Those hated tanks that crush
Cannot break the power of my Una
Nor the sun's gleaming waterfall drops
I'll defend you with my last breath

I'll defend this bit of happiness
A flame in my heart, and the tears of my son
The mercy of God, and the door of my house
Like a light at the end of my journey

And your warm eyes
And the dear lights of Bihaca
Burn in my heart tonight
In death victory comes
Don't look for my grave
Freedom will come
When I'm gone I'll be everywhere:
In a warm breeze from the Una
In the rippling and trickling river
In the smile of the child
In the blue sky of Bihaca

You will know how to find me
For everyone else I'm just a secret
And when you smell those sweet fragrance of flowers
It's the perfume of my soul

And your warm eyes
and the dear lights of Bihaca
Burn in my heart tonight
In death victory comes
Don't look for my grave
Freedom will come
When I'm gone I'll be everywhere

I have no cannons that roar
But I have faith in God and love
And I'll surrender you to no one else
My mother, Bosnia, my love

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Intention..

Sometimes i really felt alone in my journey. And i know that Allah is there for me. Sometimes i can felt that people around me are bored with me, but i know that Allah is always there to listen for me.

I know that no one can understand the pain that i face, but i know that Allah knows. He knows me well. I am happy when i think about Him. I felt relieved.