Bird~

I missed writing. I wish that i can share anything here..

Sometimes i wonder what is happiness is all about..

I am sick with this world..

Sometimes i hope that i am not created..

I wish that i am a bird..

I eat the fruits..

I stand on the trees and not accountable to anybody nor indeed can anybody punish me...

I wish I was a tree by the road, and that a camel would come along and eat me.

I wish that I had been all that, rather than a human being..

It was so tiring to become a human being..

Death was painful..

Life is sucked..

O rabb, help me..

Ghuraba...

Sometimes you're doing the right thing...

But then the whole world is against you...

And you started to think..

Am i doing the right thing?

Am i crazy?

Living in this world and being so different...

When following Islam would be like carrying charcoal in the hand...

And then i remember the word that the Prophet said:

Fatuba lil ghuraba'

Glad tidings to the stranger~

Run...

I felt that i want to run..

Run as far as i can...

This place is not my home...

This place is so far away from my dream..

Ya Rabb, let me run..

Ya Rabb, let me go...

Ya Rabb, let me to your Jannah...

Spina bifida~

Spina bifida occulta ("hidden")

• mild form of spina bifida
• no opening on the back, but the outer part of some of the vertebrae are not completely closed split in the vertebrae is so small that the spinal cord does not protrude
• skin at the site of the lesion may be normal, or it may have some hairs growing from it
• there may be a dimple in the skin, or a birthmark
• may have incontinence, slight ambulatory problems, and slight loss of sensation

Spina bifida cystica (myelomeningocele)

• meningeal membranes that cover the spinal cord and part of the spinal cord protrude through a cleft, forming a sac or cyst, which are clearly visible on the skin
• opening is surgically repaired, shortly after birth
• sac or cyst not only contains tissue and cerebrospinal fluid but also nerves and part of the spinal cord
• spinal cord usually damaged at that level
• as a result, there is always some degree of paralysis and loss of sensation below the damaged vertebrae
• amount of disability depends very much on where the spina bifida is and the amount of nerve damage involved
• many children and adults with this condition experience problems with bowel and bladder control
• in approximately 90% of the people with myelomeningocele, hydrocephalus, extra fluid in the ventricles of the brain, will also occur
• lipomyelomeningoceles are more extensive lesions and represent a combination of a splayed spinal cord fused with a lipomatous mass, which in turn fuses with the subcutaneous adipose tissue

Meningocele

• the least common form
• outer part of some of the vertebrae are split and the meninges are damaged and pushed out through the opening, appearing as a sac or cyst, which contains both the meninges and cerebrospinal fluid
• nerves are not usually badly damaged and are able to function, therefore there is often little disability present
• there are usually no long-term problems, although problems can arise
• defect is usually surgically closed soon after birth